
Do You Want Change or Do You Want Comfort?
You have probably heard the saying, “The only constant is change”, and that has never been more true than right now.
If you aren’t already feeling stressed, exhausted, or overwhelmed, just turn on the news. Our world is a scary place right now. Hate, violence, and divisiveness has swept over our country faster than the coronavirus.
If you feel like you are on an emotional rollercoaster, you are not alone. The truth is that we cannot have real change unless we are willing to look at ourselves, our beliefs, and our behaviors through a magnifying glass, and that can be uncomfortable.
Resilience is built when you choose change over comfort.
When you feel yourself getting carried away by your emotions, take a moment to focus on your mindset, skillset, and ability to reset.
Mindset: Focus on what you can control
What can you directly control right now? That’s where to focus your attention. The unknown is scary and your brain hates uncertainty. In fact, it would rather have an outcome it doesn’t like rather than one it doesn’t know.
Skillset: Show compassion for yourself and others
In a time when we are incredibly vulnerable, give yourself and others grace. It takes less emotional energy to be kind and has a much greater return on investment.
Reset: Practice Mind Over Moment
When you start to feel overwhelmed, stop, take a moment, and observe your emotions and feelings. This brings you back to the present, and you can’t worry about the past or feel anxious about the future when you bring yourself back to now.
We are facing an incredibly challenging time, and yes, it is uncomfortable. But this is the time to learn. This is the time to grow. And this is the time to choose change over comfort.
Please share this with a friend or family member who may be struggling. We are all in this together.
With Love,
Anne
I played piano from the time I was four years old until the age of 15 and during that time, I had a lot of recitals. I remember being so nervous before each recital. What if I played the wrong note? What if I forgot the music? My dad would look at me, hold my hands, and say:
Whatever you do, DO NOT think of pink elephants!!
At the time, I had no idea why in the world he would say this. All I do know is that when I sat down to play, all I saw were pink elephants, and I was able to tackle my nerves.
Turns out my dad was helping me to practice the ironic process theory which explains that when we try to suppress our thoughts, we focus on them even more. Seventy to 80% of our thoughts are negative and repetitive. If not managed, intrusive thoughts can lead to anxiety, depression, and a whole host of mental health challenges.
If you tend to get stuck in rumination, or if your thoughts sometimes get the best of you, here are a few ways to take back control:
1️⃣ Recognize that your thoughts are not facts.
2️⃣ Use your brain. Do a math problem, practice a different language, or play a puzzle game. When you access the prefrontal cortex, the higher level thinking part of your brain, you get out of the emotional limbic system.
3️⃣ Distract yourself. Sometimes a simple distraction gives you enough distance to quiet your intrusive thoughts.
4️⃣ Practice mindfulness.
5️⃣ See a therapist. When negative, intrusive thoughts impact your ability to do your job, maintain relationships, or start clouding your judgment, it may be time to get help. As someone with plenty of intrusive thoughts, therapy has helped me tremendously.
Don’t forget, your thoughts and feelings are not facts. They are simply habits that need to be shifted. Be patient with yourself, and if all else fails, whatever you do, DO NOT THINK OF PINK ELEPHANTS!

Anne Grady is a Speaker, Author, and #TruthBomb Dropper.
Anne shares practical strategies that can be applied both personally and professionally to improve relationships, navigate change, and triumph over adversity. And she’ll make you laugh while she does it. Anne is a two time TEDx speaker, and her work has been featured in numerous media outlets, including Harvard Business Review, Entrepreneur, Forbes, Fast Company and Inc. magazines, CNN, ESPN, and FOX Business. She is the best selling author of 52 Strategies for Life, Love & Work and Strong Enough: Choosing Courage, Resilience and Triumph.