No Complaints! No Problems! No Bad Moods! No Negativity!
What would happen if you put a sign like this outside of your office, cubicle, bedroom or house? What if for the next 24-hours, you heard no problems, no complaints, no negativity, no venting and no gossip? My guess is that you would feel pretty darn good.
Whether you are a victim of letting other people dump their problems and negativity all over you, or if you are in the habit if dumping on yourself, follow these steps to get your 24-hour pass for a dump free zone:
1. Stop dumping on yourself. Are you guilty of saying negative things to yourself about yourself? Do you find yourself thinking negative, self-defeating thoughts? Create a no dumping rule for yourself. Every time one of those thoughts comes into your head, yell at it, “No Dumping!”
2. Create a no dumping sign. Our brains respond to visual ques. If you want to remember to stay positive or create an environment of positivity around you, make a sign or get some other visual reminder that you’ll see often.
3. Stop enabling the dumping. Remember, you train people how to treat you. If others are coming to you full of negativity, complaints, and drama, you have to ask yourself what you’re doing to enable the behavior. Even just passively listening gives people the invitation to continue.
4. Practice extreme happy. You’ve heard of extreme sports? Practice extreme happy. Every time you head down a path of negativity, claw your way back to happy, kicking and fighting if you have to.
5. Just say “no”. I’ve had people say to me, “Yeah right. When someone is complaining about something, what do you want me to do, stop them?” YES! Either gently change the subject, change the direction of the conversation, or move on. You get to choose what you listen to.
6. Give yourself a “holiday”. If the thought of overcoming negativity, complaining, and dumping all together is too overwhelming, make up your mind not to engage in it for the next hour. Baby steps.
7. What’s the payoff? Every behavior has a reason. If you can’t seem to escape the negativity, you have to start asking yourself what benefit you’re getting from the behavior. Once you figure it out, find a different way to get it.
Make it a great week, and remember, NO DUMPING!