Will It Matter?

Will It Matter?

Will It Matter?

Last week, my son Evan started the 3rd grade, and my daughter Rylee started the 4th grade.  After hearing about their first days of school, all kinds of memories came flooding back.  I remember the 4th grade like it was yesterday.  My family moved from Bethel, Connecticut, where I had been raised, to Corpus Christi, Texas.  Talk about a culture shock!

I remember walking into Mrs. Garcia’s classroom completely unsure about pretty much everything.  I remember wanting to fit in with the popular kids and having a huge crush on a little boy named Daren.  It is amazing to me how much I remember about the smallest details, from my new hot pink purse (Ah, the 80s) to the plastic jelly shoes that left huge blisters on my feet but were incredibly fashionable.

What I can’t remember are all of the things that I worried about, which I can assure you, at the time seemed like life altering decisions and issues.  I can’t remember the things that kept me up at night and the choices that I labored over making.

It’s amazing how much time and energy we spend worrying about things that won’t matter in 10 days, let alone 1o-years.

It’s amazing how much time and energy we spend worrying about things that won’t matter in 10 days, let alone 1o-years. We put ourselves through complete torture for things that really just aren’t that
important.  Why?  The worrying and stress certainly aren’t helping to make a more informed decision.

What decisions and issues are you currently agonizing over?  Will they matter in a week, a year, or a decade?  If not, let it go and relax.  Chances are, whatever you decide will work out just fine.  If the decision does have lasting consequences, worrying and stressing most certainly won’t lead to a better decision, it will just suck the emotional energy right out of you.

It sure is fun watching my kids grow up and taking trips down memory lane.  While they might be the ones in school, they are my teachers.

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Read that again. 🙌 ...

I played piano from the time I was four years old until the age of 15 and during that time, I had a lot of recitals. I remember being so nervous before each recital. What if I played the wrong note? What if I forgot the music? My dad would look at me, hold my hands, and say:

Whatever you do, DO NOT think of pink elephants!!

At the time, I had no idea why in the world he would say this. All I do know is that when I sat down to play, all I saw were pink elephants, and I was able to tackle my nerves.

Turns out my dad was helping me to practice the ironic process theory which explains that when we try to suppress our thoughts, we focus on them even more. Seventy to 80% of our thoughts are negative and repetitive. If not managed, intrusive thoughts can lead to anxiety, depression, and a whole host of mental health challenges.

If you tend to get stuck in rumination, or if your thoughts sometimes get the best of you, here are a few ways to take back control:

1️⃣ Recognize that your thoughts are not facts.
2️⃣ Use your brain. Do a math problem, practice a different language, or play a puzzle game. When you access the prefrontal cortex, the higher level thinking part of your brain, you get out of the emotional limbic system.
3️⃣ Distract yourself. Sometimes a simple distraction gives you enough distance to quiet your intrusive thoughts.
4️⃣ Practice mindfulness.
5️⃣ See a therapist. When negative, intrusive thoughts impact your ability to do your job, maintain relationships, or start clouding your judgment, it may be time to get help. As someone with plenty of intrusive thoughts, therapy has helped me tremendously.

Don’t forget, your thoughts and feelings are not facts. They are simply habits that need to be shifted. Be patient with yourself, and if all else fails, whatever you do, DO NOT THINK OF PINK ELEPHANTS!

Pets provide a deep sense connection and unconditional love. I don’t know what I’d do without without these two nut jobs! Happy National Love Your Pet Day! ❤️🐶 #mindfulmonday #mindfulness #petsnuggles #ilovemydogs #petsofinstagram #nationalloveyourpetday ...

I hope your Friday includes donuts. 🍩 ...

Midweek reminder: Reset your mindset. 🧠 ...

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Anne Grady is a Speaker, Author, and #TruthBomb Dropper.

Anne shares practical strategies that can be applied both personally and professionally to improve relationships, navigate change, and triumph over adversity. And she’ll make you laugh while she does it. Anne is a two time TEDx speaker, and her work has been featured in numerous media outlets, including Harvard Business Review, Entrepreneur, Forbes, Fast Company and Inc. magazines, CNN, ESPN, and FOX Business. She is the best selling author of 3 books. Her newest, Mind Over Moment: Harness the Power of Resilience, is available on Amazon now.


  1. As always your posts are so inspirational that makes me realize how much we worry about so many little things. Thank you for your reminders.

  2. Great post, Anne. I can’t remember where I heard it first, but I always say, “There is no such thing as a right or wrong decision, but only a decision…Because you can never know how the path may have turned out.” The path not taken may have turned out worse, right? So you’re right that we shouldn’t live in hindsight or sweat the present things that trouble us.

  3. Dear Anne, again… I love you posts, your thoughts and your positive thoughts and activities. I too have been having memory lane trips with watching all the little ones get ready to go back to school. Precious memories for sure. Not only to I thrive on your weekly posts, but I have also been reading a great book in the evenings. An oldie, but a goody….timeless actually… a book by the name of “Stop Worrying and Start Living” by Dale Carnegie. It too has helped me through some dark times as well. Thought you might like to read it too or pass it on. You my dear could have written the book yourself! Glad all is well with you and yours. Thank you for all you do for me and so many others. Love and Blessings sweet friend. Lisa

    • Hi my friend 🙂 I so love hearing from you. I love the book recommendation…thank you! I’m working on my book now, so hopefully you can review it for me 🙂

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