Be Where You Are When You’re There
Be Where You Are When You're There
Be Where You Are When You’re There
How many times do you catch yourself not being present?
Research shows we spend almost half of our time thinking about something other than what we are doing. And according to another study, 86% of smartphone users check their phones while talking with others.
About this time last year, I was on a plane getting ready to take off when the woman sitting next to me got a phone call. She answered and started FaceTiming with her two kids – loudly. Everybody within 10 rows could hear her conversation, some of them started looking annoyed, and I caught myself feeling the same way.
But then, as I listened to her conversation (because it was impossible not to) I realized she was completely focused on her kids. She said, “So tell me about your teacher.” And one of her kids replied: “She’s great, I really like her,” to which the mom responded, “Tell me why.”
People were getting annoyed with her because she was so loud, but I started thinking about how awesome it was that she cared about her kids’ day so much. She wasn’t just saying “uh-huh” like parents often do; she was genuinely curious. I realized I want to have more conversations like that (maybe just not that loudly while on an airplane).
So how can you be less “busy” and distracted and more present and focused in your relationships?
Here are 3 strategies to get started:
1. Grow your attention muscle with mindfulness.
Mindfulness simply means paying attention on purpose. Practicing mindfulness allows you to increase the grey matter density in your brain responsible for attention, focus, and emotional regulation. Studies show people who meditate in their 40s and 50s have the same grey matter density as people in their 20s and 30s. I realize this sounds simple, and for a long time, I thought it was hokey. What you are really doing is training your brain to control your attention, and remember, what you practice grows stronger. The goal of mindfulness is to bring yourself back to the present moment.
2. Make time for what matters.
As someone who is very career and goal-oriented, I have had to learn a very important lesson: Your eulogy and resume should not be the same thing. No one is going to stand over your grave and say, “She worked 80 hours a week. Hell yeah!” Building resilience requires that we take time to stop and pre-determine how we are going to invest our time. Invest is the operative word. Time is one of the few resources you can’t get back or make more of. Everyone has the same 86,400 seconds in a day, and if you aren’t deliberate about how you spend those moments, they will get filled with whatever is screaming the loudest for your attention.
What and who are your most important priorities? Does the way you spend your time reflect that?
3. Be where you are when you’re there.
We have a finite amount of attention, so it is important to be deliberate about where we focus it. Unfortunately, we tend to do the opposite. The entire basis for my book, Mind Over Moment: Harness the Power of Resilience, is the concept of being present. When you are truly present, you are both productive and engaged – focused on accomplishing the tasks before you and building and strengthening relationships. While it may be tempting to knock out an email at a red light or respond to that text while having a meal with a friend, practice being present. The more often you practice, the easier it gets. Because the truth is, you can decide how you want to live through every moment of your life. You make time for what’s most important to you.
When we practice these habits, beliefs, and behaviors, we empower ourselves to get beyond the moments that urgently trigger our brain to react; we allow ourselves to stop, take charge of our thoughts in the moment, and actually train our minds to be more resilient.
Stay brave and resilient,
Anne
Subscribe to Anne's Resilience Reset Email!
Anne breaks down the daily habits and skills needed to grow and cultivate RESILIENCE.
I had an incredible time chatting with @dr.cindyspeaks on Positively Altered about one of my favorite topics >> resilience!
💪 We covered everything from how stress affects the brain to actionable strategies for resetting your resilience and reclaiming balance. Plus… we even talked donkeys!
🎧 Listen here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/episode-23-the-resilience-reset-transforming-stress/id1773804535?i=1000699134975
In this episode, we dive into:
🧠 How to train your brain for resilience
😩 The power of sitting in the “suck”
💡 Simple strategies to reset stress and find balance
If you’re ready to transform stress into strength, this one’s for you!
What is on your to-do list for the week? ✅
I’m sure it includes meetings, tasks, personal chores, and follow-ups, but does it include things that bring you joy?
Instead of waiting for happiness, create it.. You can even focus on enjoyable things while doing the have-to do things.
Slogging through paperwork? Light a candle and listen to your favorite tunes.
Going for a drive? Listen to a stand-up comic or a great book.
Don’t neglect what brings you joy and happiness—make it a ritual and part of your resilience-building routine.
You know that heart-stopping moment when you try to change lanes, only to realize that someone is in your blind spot?
Blind spots aren’t just for driving. In life and leadership, we all have blind spots—things others see clearly that we don’t.
The tricky part? Blind spots aren’t always glaring flaws. Often, they’re our good intentions getting lost in translation. So, how do you uncover them?
Here’s a simple twist that will make a big difference: Ask for advice instead of feedback. 🗣
This slight shift makes people more likely to offer constructive, actionable insights—without triggering defensiveness. Plus, it builds trust and strengthens relationships.
Rather than trying to make drastic changes, pick one behavior and integrate it into your day.
Want to start a gratitude practice? Do it while you brush your teeth. Want to take deep breaths? Practice while you make coffee. Adding a new habit to an existing one makes it easier to stick with it.
#mindfulmonday #habitstacking #atomichabits #jamesclear
Humor changes your biochemistry, emotions, thoughts, and behavior. 😆
A positive mood boosts your immune system! Whether you find your laughter through being around friends, going to a comedy show, watching funny movies, or just being goofy, don’t underestimate the power of a belly laugh and a sense of humor.
When something stressful happens, there are really 2 different things taking place.
There’s the thing that is happening, and then there is the story that you tell yourself about the thing that’s happening.
The story is where criticism, judgment, self-doubt, and shame come in.
Whatever you have going on in your life right now, take a step back and try to view it from a third-person perspective. See if you can separate the facts from the story you tell yourself about it.
If we can start to separate the situation from the story, the story becomes much less scary because we realize it is one we’re telling.
This makes it easier to accept where you are without judgment, self-doubt, and shame. What we practice grows stronger. 📕
Read Up on Resilience!
Anne’s Books Available on Amazon.com!
Anne Grady is a Speaker, Author, and #TruthBomb Dropper.
Anne shares practical strategies that can be applied both personally and professionally to improve relationships, navigate change, and triumph over adversity. And she’ll make you laugh while she does it. Anne is a two time TEDx speaker, and her work has been featured in numerous media outlets, including Harvard Business Review, Entrepreneur, Forbes, Fast Company and Inc. magazines, CNN, ESPN, and FOX Business. She is the best selling author of 3 books. Her newest, Mind Over Moment: Harness the Power of Resilience, is available on Amazon now.
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Be Where You Are When You’re There
Be Where You Are When You're There
Be Where You Are When You’re There
Subscribe to Anne's #RoutineResilience Email!
Anne breaks down the daily habits and skills needed to grow and cultivate RESILIENCE.
I had an incredible time chatting with @dr.cindyspeaks on Positively Altered about one of my favorite topics >> resilience!
💪 We covered everything from how stress affects the brain to actionable strategies for resetting your resilience and reclaiming balance. Plus… we even talked donkeys!
🎧 Listen here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/episode-23-the-resilience-reset-transforming-stress/id1773804535?i=1000699134975
In this episode, we dive into:
🧠 How to train your brain for resilience
😩 The power of sitting in the “suck”
💡 Simple strategies to reset stress and find balance
If you’re ready to transform stress into strength, this one’s for you!
What is on your to-do list for the week? ✅
I’m sure it includes meetings, tasks, personal chores, and follow-ups, but does it include things that bring you joy?
Instead of waiting for happiness, create it.. You can even focus on enjoyable things while doing the have-to do things.
Slogging through paperwork? Light a candle and listen to your favorite tunes.
Going for a drive? Listen to a stand-up comic or a great book.
Don’t neglect what brings you joy and happiness—make it a ritual and part of your resilience-building routine.
You know that heart-stopping moment when you try to change lanes, only to realize that someone is in your blind spot?
Blind spots aren’t just for driving. In life and leadership, we all have blind spots—things others see clearly that we don’t.
The tricky part? Blind spots aren’t always glaring flaws. Often, they’re our good intentions getting lost in translation. So, how do you uncover them?
Here’s a simple twist that will make a big difference: Ask for advice instead of feedback. 🗣
This slight shift makes people more likely to offer constructive, actionable insights—without triggering defensiveness. Plus, it builds trust and strengthens relationships.
Rather than trying to make drastic changes, pick one behavior and integrate it into your day.
Want to start a gratitude practice? Do it while you brush your teeth. Want to take deep breaths? Practice while you make coffee. Adding a new habit to an existing one makes it easier to stick with it.
#mindfulmonday #habitstacking #atomichabits #jamesclear
Humor changes your biochemistry, emotions, thoughts, and behavior. 😆
A positive mood boosts your immune system! Whether you find your laughter through being around friends, going to a comedy show, watching funny movies, or just being goofy, don’t underestimate the power of a belly laugh and a sense of humor.
When something stressful happens, there are really 2 different things taking place.
There’s the thing that is happening, and then there is the story that you tell yourself about the thing that’s happening.
The story is where criticism, judgment, self-doubt, and shame come in.
Whatever you have going on in your life right now, take a step back and try to view it from a third-person perspective. See if you can separate the facts from the story you tell yourself about it.
If we can start to separate the situation from the story, the story becomes much less scary because we realize it is one we’re telling.
This makes it easier to accept where you are without judgment, self-doubt, and shame. What we practice grows stronger. 📕
Anne Grady is a Speaker, Author, and #TruthBomb Dropper.
Anne shares practical strategies that can be applied both personally and professionally to improve relationships, navigate change, and triumph over adversity. And she’ll make you laugh while she does it. Anne is a two time TEDx speaker, and her work has been featured in numerous media outlets, including Harvard Business Review, Entrepreneur, Forbes, Fast Company and Inc. magazines, CNN, ESPN, and FOX Business. She is the best selling author of 52 Strategies for Life, Love & Work and Strong Enough: Choosing Courage, Resilience and Triumph.